The Worlds Best (In my opinion)

By now you have all figured out that I have a rather warped sense of humor and head out on some rather strange adventures.
Since I have been going nuts for a donut for the past month I have decided to search out the worlds best donut! I am willing to try any type of donut so if you have a recommendation let me know. I figure by the time I find the worlds best donut I will have to begin a quest for the worlds easiest diet.
I have already been on several quest for the worlds best. It took years of eating and traveling but I did find the worlds best pancake. It was found at a truck stop on Raton Pass on the New Mexico side. I have had pancakes since I found it and it is still the best.
I have looked for the best French Dip sandwich. At this point the leader is here in Iowa City at a Pub called Mickeys. I am still looking for one to beat it but no luck yet.
The very best french fries are also in Iowa City at Jimmy Jacks barbecue shack. Very crunch and not greasy at all.
I have found the very best gin and tonic in London but I can't remember the name of the place. It appears I had more than one since I can't remember the name of the place.
The very best bottled Gin is made in Iowa of all places. The bottler is Clearheart in Cedar Rapids. It is more of a Genevieve Gin than a Juniper berry gin. Very yummy.

In college I looked for the worlds best running shoe and finally found Nike Finland Blues. They were awesome shoes but are no longer made.

I was on a quest for the worlds best sex but had to give it up because I wasn't getting enough sleep! Hey what can I say. I had my youth in the 70's and 80's.

I already had the worlds best parents and still have the worlds best brother so my life is good.

Until the next time, happy donut hunting!

Mothers Day

Mothers Day when your mother is gone is strange. She has been gone for quite a while but I still miss her everyday.
I thought I would take this space to say thanks to her for all she gave me.

Thanks for letting me grow up in a house filled with love.
Thanks for letting me fail so I could learn how to succeed.
Thanks for letting me grow up to be the woman I wanted to be not what others expected me to be.
Thanks for giving me the courage to speak my mind, even if I was wrong.
Thanks for standing by me when I was wrong.
Thanks for always having a box of band aids ready.
Thanks for coming to get me at the police station when I got caught out after curfew.
Thanks for getting your drivers license so you could haul me all over town.
Thanks for getting my string bass in and out of the car when I was too small to do it myself.
Thanks for helping to mend my broken heart on more times than I can remember.
Thanks for having my first legal beer with me.
Thanks for teaching me how to tap dance.
Thanks for teaching me how to make hats out of paper bags.

Thanks for being My Mom.

Love,
Cheryl

Spring in Iowa

Since I have spent months complaining about how long the winter has been I thought it was time for me to share some spring time thoughts. The sights and sounds of spring always amaze me. I’m not sure if it is because I have been stuck inside for so long or what. As the Earth starts to warm up for us I’m going to share my observations with you.
1.The starlings at the bird feeders have started to turn all black again, losing all their winter white spots.
2.The male cardinals have started warming up their vocal cords by practicing their mating songs.
3.There is a flood warning at Marengo.
4.The Eagles have all left their winter hunting grounds by the river. I will miss seeing them,
5.The male robins have returned. You can tell they are males because they look like they are wearing black baseball caps backwards! Not that it matters unless you are another robin.
6.I saw 2 Great Blue Herons flying over the house yesterday.
7.There is flooding in Marengo.
8.Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum (the 2 groundhogs at the corner) have begun to come out of their den on sunny days. Haven’t seen any babies yet.
9.I got a very brief glimpse of the resident beaver down at our lake.
10.The excellent art work of children has started showing up on the sidewalks.
11.Did I mention the flooding in Marengo?
12.You can hear the very best sound of spring. The kids at the day care next door laughing so hard they are wetting themselves. Why don’t adults laugh this hard?
13.You have to keep a rag by the door to wipe the dogs’ paws when they come in or you have doggie art on your floors.
14.The above mentioned dog starts to shed and you think she will surely be bald any day.
15.High impact flooding at Marengo.
16.I start trying to figure out how to work in the garden even though there is standing water in it.
17.I’m tempted to put my ice scraper away but know better. It’s only March in Iowa and we can get a lot more snow.
18.Iowa City residents start looking at the Iowa River and hope it won’t flood again this year. It truly is very high and I am concerned. If my house floods all of Iowa City is in big trouble since I live on a hill.
19.The daffodils and crocus are poking their heads up in the circle garden.
20.You can hear the frogs croaking at night.
21.I think this is the time of year Marengo floods.
22.The bunnies have started playing catch me, catch me! Baby bunnies to follow soon.

That is just one day of observations for me. I truly love the spring. It makes me even happier to be alive.
Now I don’t know where Marengo Iowa is, but I do know I don’t want to live there. I have heard rumors it floods there.
Enjoy the wonders of Spring.

Thoughts on turning 55

My mom always said to me that when you turn the same age as the years you were born in it was supposed to be a special year. I was born in 1955 and will be turning 55 in a few days.

You know how people say "If I had know I would live this long I would have taken better care of myself."? Now I know what they mean. I never thought I would live to 30 let alone 55. I could not have envisioned myself as a 55 year old with a limp and grey hair. I suppose it isn't that bad, I could be a 30 year old with a limp and grey hair. I always wondered what the tattoo I got when I was 21 would look like when I was older. Notice how I didn't say old.

I guess I'm at that point in my life where I look back and the things I have done. Most of it I'm glad I did and fairly proud of what I accomplished. Like most people there are a few things I have done that I am not very proud of and I am sorry I did them. Just more learning experiences!

So what am I going to do now? Well I need to add a few more things to my bucket list since it is getting rather short.

Let's see I still need to:
1.Take the kayak down the hill behind the house.
2.Learn to row on a crew.
3.Learn to not hate lima beans.
4.See if I can still do a cartwheel.
5.Not break any more bones. See items 1 and 4 on the list!
6.Become the best drummer I can.
7.Rediscover a passion.
8.Pursue the above passion with gusto.
9.Convince myself that I am not old just well aged.

I'm sure I can think of a few more to put on but not today.

To my friends and family I want to thank you for putting up with all of my slightly nutty ideas. For convincing me I really am hurt and taking me to the hospital! Thank you for just being who you are and for accepting me for who I am.

So for the next years of my life I'm going to live my life to the fullest and do my very best to not repeat the mistakes of the past. I am going to celebrate living everyday and smile at people I don't know.

The Waitress

Have you ever really looked at how much time we spend just waiting? Think about it for even a few minutes and your brain starts to buzz. It never ends.

We wait to be born for months. Then we get born and we have to wait to get all cleaned up before we get to see our parents.

We wait for the cable TV guy. They can be here between 8 and 5 three weeks from next Tuesday but only if it is a full moon. Okay we will wait. This is after we have been put on ignore by them and wait 45 minutes for them to answer our call.

When we go out to eat we wait for a parking spot, we wait for a table, we wait for the waitress to come back and take our order, we wait for our food. We usually end up waiting for someone to finish their meal or they end up waiting for us. We wait for the waitress to bring us the check. We get tired of waiting so we trip her to get her attention. We feel bad about this so we wait for the ambulance with her.

We wait at traffic lights. You would think they could hire somebody to get the lights in sync so all four directions wouldn't have to wait.

We wait in line at the grocery store. Then we finally make it to the cashier and we have to wait on a price check. We wait for the person to run into the middle of the store trying to find the item. Can't find it so they run back to see the item again. Wait more and try to decide if food is really necessary after all. We just have to wait for it to cook. Runner guy comes back with a price that the cashier rings up wrong. So we wait for the manager to come clear the entry. We wait for them to finish bagging our purchase the wait for the carry-out kid since they don't trust us with their carts.

But wait there is more!

We wait to see the doctor in the waiting room. We wait in the exam room. We wait on the lab to get our test results back to the doctor. We wait for the doctor to call us with these results. Then we have to wait for the pharmacy to get our medication. Lucky us we have to wait 3 hours after eating to take our medicine.

We wait in line at the restroom. If we are lucky we don't have to wait for the only stall that happens to have a woman with 3 kids in there that have to go too. Wait.. why do women have to do this?

I'm starting to get a headache from all this waiting. I'd take some aspirin but I'd just have to wait for them to start working.

Adventures at the Boobologist

Let me start off by saying that if I had to I would go through all of this again. I wouldn't like it but I would do it.

For those of you that don't know me or haven't seen me in years let me tell you about myself. I'm about 5'8" ( shorter than I used to be ) and around 140 pounds. In the chest area there is nothing to brag about. I mean you can't use my chest as a rain catchment system but not what you would call big! I'm a former body builder that has flexibility to rival a gymnast. My personality type can be summed up as, I figure that what the heck is always the correct decision. For example I think taking my kayak down the big snow covered hill by the house sounds like great fun. Everyone should be glad that it is blocked in by all the snow.

We showed up nice and early just like we were told to and get the mountain of paperwork done and head back to the prep room where they proceed to tell us what is going to go on and that it is a short procedure with very little discomfort. The nurse is nice and the doctor is a doctor. He's been doing this procedure for 10 years so he's got a bunch of experience. No problems!

Dawn heads off to the waiting room and I head into the procedure room. No problems!

My first look at the table wasn't bad. It's a hard plastic thing with an 8 or 9 inch hole in the middle for your breast to go into. The table is about 1 1/2 inches thick. All the medical stuff goes on under the table. There is a mammogram type thing under there and the biopsy machine. Now the biopsy thing is a spring loaded and pops when they fire it not loud but you can hear it when they launch it. No problems!

I get settled on this very uncomfortable table in a very awkward position and they start doing the mammogram part to find the area they need. Mammograms 1-12 they can't find it. Now we have a problem, the area they need is right next to my rib cage on the top of my breast. Enter Miss Necessity in the Mother of invention! Cheryl you think you could fit you arm and chest down through the hole? Okay I'm flexible I can do this. Now this is a 9 inch hole and I have broad shoulders but I say sure what the heck!

Now remember how I said the table is hard plastic and very thick? So after much wiggling and grunting I get the upper 1/4 of my chest into this 9 inch hole. My right arm is hanging down and all the blood rushes to it and my hand begins to swell. Uh Rose ( x-ray person ) can you get my ring off?

By this point in time the hard plastic has begun to indent itself into the top of my right shoulder and it hurts. Let the mammograms begin again! On the 19th or 20th we have success! Now Cheryl hold still and we can get started. Much easier said than done. They are all very concerned about me because I'm in this terrible and painful position. They gave me the option to quit but what the heck lets keep going.

They clean the area and give me a local so I won't feel the incision. By this time the nurse from the prep area had come into the room. I can see the concern on her face and she says she is sorry she had no idea I would end up having to do this. Now let me say here that they have NEVER had to do it this way before so there is no way she could have prepared me. She is there to literally hold my hand and help me through this.

Okay enough time has passed that I should be numb enough. Let the biopsy begin! Bang the shoot the needle into me. Oh oh we have a big problem! I can feel it!! What to do now. I start to go into shock. Clammy, hot, light-headed. We have 2 choices at this point stop and get me out of shock then start all over again or keep going. The choice is mine. My choice is keep going.

So now we have my shoulder hurting, my boob hurts and I'm a little shocky. It was bad but I know I can handle it. I have been through worse. Then it happened, a hot flash! Now in Iowa winters a hot flash can sometimes be a welcome thing. You get to have your own personal tropical vacation in the dead of winter. Now, I don't sweat no matter what I'm doing. In a matter of seconds I am drenched in sweat! The nurse uncovers me and turns on a fan all the while wiping my face with a wet rag.

Now while I feel like crud on top of the table the test is continuing under the table and I can feel every bit of it. The test didn't take that long just like they had said. Just about 15 minutes. Final part is putting a titanium chip in me so they can find the area again if they need to later. Done!!

Now I need to get myself out of that damn hole while I am in shock. Little more back ground information here. I'm the type of person that forgets to eat and when I'm nervous food is not even on my radar. All I have eaten since I woke up is a bowl of oatmeal. My blood sugar is low and shock makes it even lower. I can barely move without fainting but I manage to get out of the hole and manage to sit up.

One thing left to do. Another mammogram to check that they got everything they needed and that the titanium chip is where it is supposed to be. Remember Rose? She takes me into the room and starts the mammograms. All I can say is they have emergency release buttons on those things for a reason! I'm still very light-headed and start to pass out. Not once but 3 times! In the end we got it done.

Back to the procedure room. Get all bandaged up and dressed again. The nurse who was awesome through this whole thing hands me a single red rose! Says she is sorry she couldn't have been more help and she has never seen anybody able to go through what I just went through.

Home!! They told me that I had to sleep with a bra on tonight. Let me see do I own one??? I think I may have one somewhere. Sure enough I find the one from the last time I had this done. It has to be one size to small so you can't move, so it is small. Houston we we have another problem! I have gained weight since the last time so it is really small. Again I need to try and fit my shoulder and boob into a place that is really small and tight. After much twisting, turning and a few choice words success. Sleeping in a bra wasn't much fun and it was removed as soon as I got up. I think I may have a good old fashioned bra burning this afternoon.

I survived the whole thing. It hurt, it was uncomfortable and took 3 times as long as usual. Would I do it again? Yes. Do I want to? No

Ladies, please get your yearly well woman exam it can save your life. Gentlemen, please get a PSA test it saved my dad.

Thanks for the support during this. If I have cancer so be it. I'll just do what need to be done no matter what it is.

Make some noise!

Well tomorrow is the day. I have to go in for a Stereo-tactic Biopsy on my breast. This is the 4th time they have cut on me for wierd stuff in my breasts. It doesn't get any easier no matter how many times you go through it. To be honest I'm scared again. I figure that sooner or later my luck is going to run out and they will find something bad.

So if you can, tomorrow around 2PM central standard time MAKE SOME NOISE! If you are a drummer beat me out a good rhythm. If you aren't a drummer what's wrong with you! Turn over a trash can, get out a cooking pot or just clap a few times for me.

Okay so if you would feel like a total idiot doing any of these you can just light me a candle or send out a prayer for me. I need all the positive you can muster up! I don't care where it comes from or from what spirituality.

Thanks everybody!

Hope I have some funnier stuff to post in the future!